How not to talk about art!

About a year or so ago I was given the task of writing about art here at WDET. As someone who is creative and appreciates the subject I've always aimed to make my writing very accessible and informative. No matter how well I do I'm always on the look out for "dancing about architecture" in my own writing.

At its worst, and most annoying, are art writers and artists who speak as Charlotte Young describes humorously in the video below. Speaking in what Young calls "Art Bullocks". My goal is to never speak or write like them.

Plus, she gets points in my book for the dig at Damien Hirst.

Art Bollocks (or Stupid Kunst) - by Charlotte Young from chichard41 on Vimeo.

Here are the types and rules of "Art Bullocks":

1.)The Uncertainty Principle

2.)“Great” Art

3.) The Comfort of Mediocrity

4.) Nothing to Say and Saying It

5.) Conditionals

6.) Banality, The Critic’s Friend

The Golden Rule of "Art Bullocks":

Don’t write (or speak) facts or opinions: these are too easily challenged. Write/talk concepts. Any concepts.

What's your favorite example of bad art writing? How do we get it wrong?

By the way, if I ever speak like that I give you full license to come down to the station and smack me upside the head. If that's a little too violent for you, a quick e-mail should also get me back to my senses:

Thanks to Mary Fortuna for catching my eye with this video on Facebook.